Conduct this hour-session on the same day, at the same time, and in the same room as the eight regular sessions. Set up the room as a typical Bible class with a podium up front. Bring to the Pre-session the following items: nametags, pens, the Refreshment Schedule, the refreshments you purchased for the evening, and your “Do Not Enter” signs for the doors leading into your classroom. Listen to the second facilitator audio message entitled Pre-session. Download the message at https://marriagedynamics.com/facilitator-audios/.
I. Introduction (5 Minutes)
- Have everyone state his or her name.
- Husbands, add where you live.
- Wives, tell how long you’ve been married (or wedding date if engaged).
II. Distribute the workbooks (1 minutes)
III. Discuss the Pre-session material on pages 3-9 (28 minutes)
- Read aloud pages 3 and 4.
- Give each person 5-10 minutes to complete the writing exercise on page 5. (When about 3/4 of the group has finished writing, move to the next step.)
- Read the instructions at the top of page 6 and give each couple five minutes to complete this exercise.
- Read aloud the rest of page 6 through page 9.
- After reading pages 6-9, ask if there are any questions.
- Ask everyone to sign his or her name at the bottom of page 9 for additional commitment.
IV. Explain the necessity of class confidentiality (2 Minutes)
- Everything said in class must remain within the group.
- The class becomes very hurtful otherwise.
- Confidentiality is a key ingredient in developing a safe sharing room.
- If anyone is unwilling to keep the confidentiality rule:
- Talk to me after the Pre-session.
- I’ll try to find someone to buy your materials and take your place.
- Explain the consequences of a confidentiality breach.
- You will apologize to the person(s) harmed.
- You will apologize to the class.
- The class must determine whether to allow you to stay in the class or not.
- If even one person does not feel comfortable with the couple staying then both husband and wife must leave the group.
- Raise hands to show acceptance of this policy.
- Bind everyone to this commitment.
V. Complete the class agreement on pages 1-2 (5 Minutes)
- Ask the group to follow along as you read it aloud.
- Ask if there are any questions.
- Ask each couple to sign both workbooks.
- Ask the group to raise their right hands to bind the agreement on everyone.
VI. Explain how to use the charts at the end of each Explanation section (5 minutes)
- Ask everyone to turn to page 21 in the workbook as an example from every session.
- Explain that sharing what is missing (or in abundance) requires a special conversation that follows this order:
- Identify what you are feeling – the first column of the chart on page 21.
- Identify the cause of your feelings of discomfort – the second column of the chart.
- Follow the correct flow for helpful conversation.
- The diagram on page 22 shows how to discuss a need for improvement.
- The diagram on page 23 shows how to praise the spouse for an abundance of a marriage essential.
- Two points are vital to understand:
- The wording is not the way you probably would talk; adapt it to your style.
- The categories on page 21 are not all-inclusive; they serve only as a starting place.
VII. Distribute the refreshment schedule (2 minutes)
VIII. Go over the Growth Opportunity Timeline on page 10 (5 minutes)
- Show how each section works.
- Explain why each class lesson follows the same format – to create good habits.
- Provide the link to the Student Audios: https://marriagedynamics.com/united-course-audio-files/.
IX. Re-commit to the out of class work and timeliness to class on page 9.
X. Close with a prayer (2 minutes)
XI. Invite everyone to visit the refreshment table (1 minute)
- Meet anyone you don’t already know.
- Go home, re-read Introduction, and schedule time for each day’s growth opportunity
Facilitator: Copy the information below and give it to anyone who has not yet registered online: If anyone has not yet registered online, before you start your assignments tomorrow, go to the following website: https://marriagedynamics.com/enrollment-for-united/
Then, locate your class using the map and class listings for your location. Click on the Register button next to your class. Please fill out the form completely and click on Register. You will receive an email confirming your registration. This email will also include a link for the Beginning of Class Survey.