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I. Introduction (5 Minutes)
  1. Ask 3-4 people to share their answers to the question at the top of page 197.
  2. If time allows, ask 3-4 people to share the most helpful thing they read about or experienced regarding Emotional Intimacy.
II. Sharing Session (87 Minutes)
  1. Explain the purpose and format for taking notes in the class (1 minute)
    1. Instruct the class to open their workbooks to page 214.
    2. Write down what people say that you want to pray about.
    3. Also, write down things people say that you might want to affirm in the Group Affirmation time later in the session.
  2. Explain the sharing format (1 minute)
    1. Go to the three Waiting-to-Share Chairs at the front from now on.
    2. Remember that you have only 2.5 minutes to answer the four questions.
    3. The assistant gives a 2-minute wave and a final wave at 2.5 minutes.
    4. Please do not bring your workbook to the front.
  3. Model the sharing (5 minutes)
    1. The facilitator always shares first.
      1. Share your heartfelt answers based on your growth this week.
      2. Model how to share transparently, honestly, keeping within the time limit, and remembering to answer all four questions.
      3. The assistant does not affirm you unless both affirm people.
    2. The assistant always shares second.
      1. The assistant follows the facilitator guidelines in sharing.
      2. The assistant receives an affirmation from the facilitator.
  4. Conduct the sharing (75 minutes)
    1. Introduce the first Waiting-to-Share Chair occupant within 5 seconds.
    2. From the back, maintain eye contact with each sharer.
    3. Lead the group applause after each sharer finishes.
    4. Affirm one thing sharer says or does within 15 seconds from the front.
    5. Introduce the next sharer now sitting in the first Waiting-to-Share chair.
    6. Continue this process until everyone shares.
  5. Conduct the recap and vote (5 minutes)
    1. Ask each person to state his first name and a 1-5 word phrase that captures the most important thing about Emotional Intimacy that he or she shared.
    2. An example might be, “Marco; I need to learn to communicate my way to emotional intimacy.”
    3. After the last person recaps, distribute the ballots.
    4. Ask each person to write the name of the person who worked the hardest to upgrade his or her Emotional Intimacy this past week.
    5. The assistant collects the ballots.
    6. After dismissing the couples to the breakout area, the assistant counts the ballots, breaks any important ties, and fills in the award.
III. Break (15 Minutes)
IV. Final Session (38 Minutes)
  1. Present the award (2 minutes)
    1. Introduce the three honorees to the group using the correct procedure.
    2. Lead the applause as each one stands.
    3. Ask all three to sit down together after you honor all three together.
    4. Call the name of the book recipient and begin the applause.
    5. Ask the book recipient to come to the front, accept the book, and express thanks to the group for the honor.
    6. Ask the book recipient to start the note writing process.
  2. Explain the next week’s Growth Opportunity Timeline on page 216 (1 minute)
  3. Introduce the group affirmation (12 minutes)
    1. Direct people to scan the notes they wrote on page 214.
    2. Explain that each person stands in turn, and in 15 seconds or less, affirms one thing the selected person did or said in class.
    3. Explain that at the 20-second mark, the assistant will call time, and the affirmation stops immediately.
    4. Explain the difference between an affirmation and advice.
      1. Affirmation: “Thank you” for something the person said or did.
      2. Advice (what we do not want): “I encourage you to do so and so.”
    5. Begin with anyone and ask that person to affirm someone.
    6. Continue until everyone affirms one other person.
  4. Conduct the closing activity (20 minutes)
    1. Instruct each couple to turn their chairs toward each other.
    2. Ask each couple to turn to page 215.
    3. Explain the process each couple will follow:
      1. We will begin with the wives.
      2. When the conversations begin, each wife will have 3 minutes to explain conversationally what she wrote in just a few sentences on page 215.
      3. As each wife talks, each husband will listen without interrupting or showing impatience, boredom, or irritation.
      4. At the end of 3 minutes, my assistant will call time.
      5. Then, each husband will have 2 minutes to ask any clarifying question to make sure he understands what his wife is asking of him.
      6. Wives, as you answer any clarifying question, answer each one as briefly as you can to allow your husbands to ask as many questions as they desire in this 2-minute time limit.
      7. Husbands, any questions you ask must not argue with or show disagreement or disapproval with what your wives want from you; your purpose here is merely to make sure you know what your spouse wants from you – whether you agree with the request or not.
      8. If you can agree on the solution your spouse wants from you, wonderful! If not, you have more time at home to continue working on a solution mutually agreeable to both of you.
      9. Then, you will reverse the roles and repeat the same process with the husbands sharing their concern from page 215.
    4. Before we begin the conversations, however, listen as I read to you the shaded box on page 194.
    5. Wives, you now have 3 minutes to share and explain what you wrote on page 215.
V. Conclusion (5 Minutes)
  1. Ask 3-4 people what they learned from listening to everyone share their stories.
  2. Give a brief, encouraging Pep Talk.
  3. Get them to re-commit to:
    1. Completing the growth opportunities every day as assigned.
    2. Being on time, if not early, next week.
    3. Signing their commitments on the Timeline for Session 7 Sheet.
  4. Close with a prayer.
Class Preparation Checklist:
  1. Listen to “Facilitator Skills” and “Session 6” messages on the Facilitator audio message.
  2. Watch the DVD messages for Session 6 several times
  3. Bring nametags, award, pens, ballot, and tissue.
  4. Make sure the refreshments are coming.
Classroom Set-up Checklist
  1. Arrange room furniture for classroom set-up.
  2. Put “Do Not Enter” signs on all doors to the classroom.
  3. Write the sharing session questions on the board (see page 213 in the student handbook).