Editor’s note: While we believe this content is still relevant to our readers, we do want to make you aware of some new information. We have posted an update at the end of this article.
It’s happened again.
Another high profile marriage has ended. The Christian world was shocked not long ago when Lysa TerKeurst announced she was ending a 25-year marriage with her husband. The Proverbs 31 Ministries website founder recently let her readership know that the infidelity and substance abuse in her marriage were too much to overcome.
Speculation and conversation always abound when something like this happens. So-called “experts” line up to offer their opinions and speculate on reasons why. And then there are the I-told-you-so ruminations.
What a waste of time.
Of course, no one really knows the whole story except Lysa TerKeurst and her ex-husband.
And it’s not our job to find out.
What we need to do is this: pray for Lysa and her ex-husband as they start new chapters in their lives. We should pray that they will have wisdom, and that they’ll be able to find the healing and support they need during a tough time. Regardless of who was right or wrong, or how anything went down, we should pray for healing and hope.
Here’s something else that’s true.
Whether it’s a high-profile marriage like this one, or your marriage, or mine, when we encounter news like this it’s a perfect time to think again about what how it applies to all married couples.
Not every marriage is in danger, but they’re all under attack.
How many hundreds of external forces could potentially drive a wedge between you and your spouse every single day?
Time. Money. Sex. Kids.
That’s a short selection from a very long list of possibilities. The bottom line is, if you’re married, you’re never immune to something creeping in and doing damage.
When’s the last time you took a marriage inventory with your spouse to see what challenges might be on the horizon for your relationship?
The best thing to do in response to marriages ending for other people is not to point fingers and add to an already negative season. Look instead to what needs to be strengthened in your own marriage.
It’s interesting how we always seem to have the answers and the ability to do the right thing … until we don’t.
You probably don’t know much about the folks you might think you have all the answers for. If they just would have…. They should have…. What they needed to do was….
Try switching that around to, “I don’t want to go through that. What can I do to make sure we stay on the right track in our own marriage?” Figuring out what went wrong in someone else’s marriage isn’t nearly as valuable as working on your own.
We wish Lysa TerKeurst all the best for the days to come.
Update: In June 2017, Lysa TerKeurst shared publicly that her marriage was ending. But in June 2018, on Father’s Day, she posted a photo of her family with this message: “A gift. A hard prayed for and fought for, glorious, messy, miraculous, honest, treasured gift of together. Happy Father’s Day Art! The way you have pursued the Lord, healing, and us… is evidence of God’s supernatural grace and goodness. I’m praying for everyone praying for a miracle today. God has a plan but it will probably unfold in a way you never thought it would.”
We haven’t heard any additional news about Lysa and Art, but we were encouraged by this report and continue to hope that they can be fully healed and reconciled.
One of the key reasons marriages fail is because they lack one or more characteristics of exceptional love. Want to avoid this pitfall? Check out our free resource:
Foolproof Ways to Build Exceptional Love
Four Ways to Defend Your Marriage Against Sexual Temptation
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Articles about Marital Infidelity